How many X does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  • free jazzer: 12/5
  • software engineers: none, it's a hardware problem
  • software engineers: 10, one to change it and one to supervise.
  • dragonball characters: just one, but he takes 4 episodes
  • microsoft employees: none, darkness is the new standard
  • apple employees: none, it's all your fault, you're holding it wrong
  • flies: 2, but how did they get in there?
  • freudian slips: Two - one to screw it in and one to hold the penis... LADDER.. I mean LADDER.
  • existentialists: Two. One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
  • redditors: One, but they'll make an annoying forever alone comic about it afterward...
  • surrealists: Three. One to hold the giraffe and one to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.
  • perverts: one, but the whole emergency room to get it out.
  • straight guys in San Francisco: both of them
  • communists: None. The lightbulb contains within itself the seed of its own revolution.
  • boring people: one
  • ADHD-kids: "Wanna go ride bikes"??
How many X does it take to change a light bulb?
  • feminists: none, they never change anything
  • feminists: 50, one to change it and 49 to make a documentary about it
  • ska kids: 2, one to drop it, the other to shout "pickitup-pickitup"
  • witches: depends on what you want to change it into
  • catholics: CHANGE??!!???
  • therapists: None. The light bulb has to want to change.
  • therapists: one, but it takes three visits